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Breakfast is the Most Important Meal, Unless You Want To Get Laid

Friday, December 26, 2008
From Reuters:

" Teens who skip breakfast as middle school students tend to have sex at an earlier age than those who start the day with a proper meal, a government-backed Japanese medical researcher said on Friday."

"The survey, intended to study how to reduce unwanted pregnancies, also showed the average age of first-time sex was lower for those who found their mother annoying.

People who said they disliked their mother had sex for the first time at the average age of 16, while the average age for those who appreciated their mother was 19, Kitamura said."
[Full Story]

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Cop Provides Sex Offender With "Slutty" Photos of High School Girl

Thursday, August 21, 2008
An internet safety program presented by John F. Gay, III at a high school in Windsor, Colorado has outraged parents by singling out students' MySpace pages for criticism. According to the DenverChannel.com:
A police officer giving an Internet safety course sparked criticism for calling student MySpace pages "slutty" and telling one student a sexual predator in prison masturbated to her photo.

[ . . . ]

One female student was told by Gay that he shared her online personal info with an (sic) state inmate who said he gratified himself with her photo and would "tear her apart."
The student, who was singled out, left the assembly in tears. That's when Gay showed her telephone number that he got from the Internet and called her. He hoped to show how easy it is for anyone to track down someone posting personal information on MySpace or other social-networking sites.
[Full Story]

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Christian Group Finds New Starbucks Logo Offensive

Wednesday, June 4, 2008
The Resistance, a San Diego-based Christian group known for its penchant for conspiracy theories, has called for a nationwide boycott of Starbucks Coffee to protest the company's revised logo. The new logo, a slightly altered version of the company's original two-tailed mermaid design, depicts a bare-chested mermaid with with her nipples covered by wavy plaits of hair (the original logo, shown below, did not cover the woman's breasts at all).

The Resistance insists that the distinctly leg-less woman has her non-existent legs "spread like a prostitute. . .[t]he company might as well call themselves Slutbucks."

Though the group seems upset with the woman's lower body, several topfree groups have come to the company's defense.

The familiar green logo:


The original bare-breasted logo:


The updated, yet still offensive, hair-over-the-nipples logo:


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Utah Teacher Breaks Utah Law By Teaching

According to the Salt Lake Tribune's Roxana Orellana, "a seventh- and eighth-grade health teacher violated [Utah's] sex education statute by responding to questions from students about topics beyond the curriculum, including homosexual sex, oral sex, and masturbation."

Okay, let me get this straight. A teacher is asked a question to which she has an answer, but it relates to oral sex or homosexual sex, so she is supposed to say "I dunno"?

Way to go, Utah!

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Unfortunately, "Interspecies Erotica" in New Jersey is Not Limited to Kevin Smith Movies

Sunday, April 27, 2008
From the Courier-Post:

"New charges of sex acts with cows have been brought against a Moorestown policeman who last week was charged with sexually assaulting three girls."

Seriously, no comment.

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Congolese Penises Vanish, Panic Ensues

Wednesday, April 23, 2008
From Reuters:

"Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft."

"Rumors of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings."

According to Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, "when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it?'"
[Full Story]

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This Is, Like, The Second Incest Story This Month

Monday, April 7, 2008

"'I knew it was illegal, of course I knew it was illegal but you know, so what.

Mrs Deaves said the physical relationship with her father was like 'a sexual relationship with any other man'.

For Mr Deaves the sexual relationship was 'absolutely fantastic'.

A US psychologist told 60 Minutes the Deaves's relationship was an example of 'Genetic Sexual Attraction'.

He said the phenomenon was not rare, and society would be surprised at how prevalent it was."

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Scheisse

Sunday, April 6, 2008
From Reuters:

"A court in Germany sentenced a law professor to three years in prison for giving students better marks in exchange for sex and money.

The 53-year-old from the central city of Hanover admitted accepting 156,000 euros ($244,000) in total for awarding doctorates to students who failed to make the grade."

And here I am working for my degree...sheesh.

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School Days, School Days

Thursday, April 3, 2008
From Local6.com (Orlando):

"A recent survey that found some Florida teens believe drinking a cap of bleach will prevent HIV and a shot of Mountain Dew will stop pregnancy has prompted lawmakers to push for an overhaul of sex education in the state."
[Full story]

Evidentially abstinence-only sex education adds another feather to Florida's already thickly-plumed graduation cap...


"Three out of 10 US public school students do not graduate from high school, and major city school districts only graduate one out of two students, according to a study released Tuesday."

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